Courage To Fly

Prelude No. 10 by Sergei Rachmaninoff was my muse for this poem today. It's on my playlist Another Side Of Me.
If you listen to it, you might vividly imagine the exhileration of flight.

It began with a dream
an effort so it seemed
a destiny, a courage to fly

then slowly as time went by
it began a slow spiral, spinning
impossible for winning

I felt the wind take me higher to infinity
as gravity pulled me back to reality
stealing my very breath

putting my soul to the test
crashing, burning, falling
wasting time crawling

a spiral of life going around and 'round
right in front of me, slamming to the ground
helplessly I reach out my hands

attempting to catch it smothering on these lands
I thought I could go anywhere, do anything
I've failed on broken wings

I smile none the less
as again, I'll try and do my best
and once my wings are healed

taking flight, the sky revealed
this is not the end of my journey
there is too much to see

Photos were taken in the gulf and during my flight from Boston to Atlanta. I had a layover on my way to Orlando.

Sink Or Swim

I'm sorry if I've hurt you but I'm drowning.
I'm leaving this home we built in good timing.
The water all around me is rising
and I'm finding myself defining
exactly who I am and who I am not
for the first time, the fear makes me hot
My pulse races and I begin to sweat
as I reach for running thoughts I'll never get
They say sink or swim, you can't have both so you said
so here I am suddenly paddling for shore, away from your bed
There standing along the water's edge
is the magnificent glow and comfort of two familiar faces, leaning on the ledge
comtemplating the jump to meet me half way
because they already know how to swim anyway
and even if we don't make it back to shore
and all our time is spent swimming towards more
maybe we'll learn to back float and appreciate the sky
and maybe I'll never understand why
I've waited so long to enjoy the ride
but either way, there's still a high tide
the water smashes rocks along the floor
discarding all things in it's way, eroding, torn
we run the risk of danger, we're floating in it's turbulant path
but let's help each other find a spot to hold and latch
we run the risk of never pulling ourselves up from the depths
and I may fail, it may be difficult and require a lot of strength
but it's impossible to worry about the time of length
Should she stay on shore, holding a tree and leaning into the wind
or should she jump and fall in love with her best friend?
It's me standing there trying to save myself, the part I left behind
I think I'll dive and risk the pain of time
and love myself for the very first time, treading water
consider myself a best friend again even though trust is harder and harder
and it's you standing next to her, looking down, holding your breath
watching, patiently waiting to reach out a kind hand, reach for whatever's left

BAHAHA I write blogs like anyone actually reads them lol

bahahahahahahaahaha

It's invigorating how you may pass people in life and never know if you'll see them again.

It could be anyone, anywhere, anytime and suddenly, love falls on your lap like rain

from a cloud, or maybe a crashing plane. You don't know it when it happens.

It might take a long time and often times there's a state of denial because it couldn't

possibly be real, be comfortable, be that simple, that lovely... but it was indeed even if

it wasn't long enough, at least you've had it at all.

This is where our story begins.

This is something I'm working on. It's the beginning of a new novel idea I came up with and

I'd like to actually finish. What do you think of this paragraph? I can not post more about the story until it's completely finished which may take a long time but was curious about this.

For Connie

The world has turned the day to dark. I leave this night with heavy heart.

When I return to dry your eyes,

I will sing this lullaby. Yes, I will sing this lullaby.

I miss you..

River Dam

Sometimes like a river dam we overflow with stagnant water when we least expect it and the many paths once created by that wall converge and bring out a ration, erode or destroy what was so powerfully protected... Gravity wins making room for a new way of unity irrelevant to what's best but necessary all along... foolish people build dams and surprise themselves when they break..

Walk On The Ocean

We spotted the ocean
At the head of the trail
Where are we goin'
So far away
And somebody told me
That this is the place
Where everything's better
And everything's safe

CHORUS:
Walk on the ocean
Step on the stones
Flesh becomes water
Wood becomes bone

Half an hour later
We packed up our things
We said we'd send letters
And all of those little things
And they knew we were lyin'
But they smiled just the same
It seemed they'd already
Forgotten we came

(CHORUS X 2)

Back at the homestead
Where the air makes you choke
And people don't know you
And trust is a joke
We don't even have pictures
Just memories to hold
grows sweeter each season
as we slowly grow old

I came back to what I thought was home only to learn I'm a visitor for the first time.

I knock on the doors of homes I considered my own once.

I'm greeted with grins and surprise, excitement and they roll out the red carpet for their

visitor from another time as if I'm a long lost part of their history but proudly retreived.

They brush the dust off the seat I used to sit in as I ease myself into what used to be.

I look around and nothing's changed but change is all I feel.

I thought I was homesick. I came back to find I never knew home until now.

This very moment as I sit and contemplate the decisions I've made that removed myself

from the circle, the unity that once existed, I'm only missing my home, my life, my lover,

my bed, my kitchen, my front door, my own shower.

The only thing I learn as I grow is I've known nothing at all about anything I thought I did and to continually

let life's lessons humble me over and over again.

I missed these friends I can't seem to replace but have been so quickly replaced by.

I'm a visitor, a guest, an outsider and I put myself there.

It stings a bit, I won't lie. I wonder what I've done. What I should or could have done and I remember

what I did and suddenly, I'm proud.

I understand more now than ever what I won't know until then and it's refreshing.

I think I've figured out that I just have to live every moment isntead of the ones after and be grateful for those before and above all, never regret. Never regret.